My 2013 Highlights (According to Facebook)

Above:  The only new picture of me Facebook got last year.

Facebook gave me a handy list of the biggest events that happened to me in 2013... according to my status updates. They managed to catch my house in there, which was awfully cognizant of them.

Other gems from the year include:

• Stephen Bradford is baking bread and watching Gilmore Girls. So at some point he turned into a housewife.
• That moment when you borrow a friend's glasses and your vision improves.
• The day I stopped being a child was the day I realized that Sunny D is not very good.
• What I would say to my children in 25 words or less: "What the...? Where did you come from? WHO's your mother?"
• Fruit Stripes Gum! I have some now - not because of the delicious fruity flavor, but simply to marvel that it still exists!
• Green smoothie for breakfast, salad for lunch... I've been good today. Fruity Pebbles for dinner.
• I find myself feeling oddly wistful tonight. And you know what sparked it? Video. Game. Music.
  
  Only thing worse than being a nerd is being a sappy, emotional nerd.
• Father's Day doesn't mean much when you're single... but even I had to laugh when a bunch of twenty-something women got up to sing "I'm So Glad When Daddy Comes Home" in church.
• The box of brownie mix says, "Stir 50 strokes with a spoon." Well, I used a WHISK, and I don't even COUNT my strokes. So, what are you going to do about that, brownie mix?
• I've got a hot date tonight with TWO GIRLS at once!
  
  Barnes and Noble ARE both women, right?

Heck, that last one could probably hold true for any given weekend in 2014.